I am probably going to go to the bookstore and buy a book about the meaning of dreams after writing this blog post. I would really like to understand my dreams & find out if they have any meaning behind them at all, or if they’re just a load of crap thoughts floating through my mind while I’m sleeping.

My latest strange dream begins with me in the kitchen. For some unknown reason I am either thinking about or craving coffee. So I open up the main food cupboard in the kitchen & reach up to the top shelf to grab the electric coffee grinder.

At this time I should note that: 1. The cupboard’s top shelf in my dream is much higher than it is in real life because I had to stand on my tiptoes to reach it, AND 2. I don’t keep the coffee grinder in the food cupboard, or even in a high place.

As I’m standing up on my tiptoes to reach & grab the electric coffee grinder, the empty box I usually store the coffee grinder in falls down & gently hits the top of my head before landing on the ground. I momentarily look down at the box on the kitchen floor & think to myself, “Huh! Why is the box empty? I don’t keep that in this cupboard.” Then, I look up again to get the coffee grinder itself, but as I reach up, a box of cereal mysteriously appears behind the coffee grinder & also falls onto the kitchen floor.

Now I’m fully looking down at the kitchen floor, completely ignoring the coffee grinder I was intending to get in the first place. There is a huge mess of frosted corn flakes all over the floor, in the area right next to my small eat-in dining table. At this point I don’t even wonder how the cereal mess traveled all the way over there when the cupboard the cereal box fell out of is clearly ten-plus feet away, & there is no cereal trail leading from the cupboard to the table. (I am reading too much into these random details. Am I deviating from the main story? I call that the ‘Shiny Nickel’ effect.)

I absentmindedly start cleaning up the cereal by brushing the frosted corn flakes with my cupped hands into small piles on the floor. I also use my forearms to make sweeping motions across the floor. Next thing I can remember is that I’m scooping the piles of corn flakes & depositing them into random Tupperware containers, not even checking if the containers already have leftover food in them or not. As I’m scooping up the cereal, I look down at the mess & think to myself, “This mess never gets any smaller, no matter how much I clean it up!” Immediately following that thought I get an extremely strong urge to use the bathroom. I can no longer concentrate & only think of urinating. Why am I now debating with myself over cleaning up the cereal mess or taking a piss? I am actually mulling this over in my mind in my dream.

To pee, or not to pee. A very important discussion topic. Especially while cleaning up a cereal shit show.

Why am I making things worse for myself in my dream? I continue to debate whether or not I should just go to the bathroom & clean up the kitchen afterwards, or if I should wait to take a piss. I decide to get up from sitting on the kitchen floor & get the vacuum cleaner. I feel a sense of disappointment that I’m wasting the cereal, but I hate having a dirty kitchen. Suddenly, for no reason whatsoever, I take the time to notice that there are empty sunflower seed shells strewn about underneath the eat-in dining table. I shake my head & question who has been sloppily eating sunflower seeds again & not properly cleaning up after themselves. I know who the culprit is, but all I can do is grow increasingly frustrated with the filthy state of the kitchen.

Is it that time already? Can I hold back any longer? Should I prolong this agony even more? NO!

Finally, I tell myself out loud that I should go to the bathroom. I am now repeatedly telling myself that I need to take a piss, & I should not deviate from making a liquid deposit into the porcelain bowl. I tell myself so loudly that I need to piss, that I end up waking myself out of a sound sleep. I immediately, mechanically get out of bed & tell myself aloud that I am going to use the bathroom. I don’t know why I have to announce to myself what I’m going to do. There is nobody else in the bedroom with me. Why would my warm & soft bed care what I’m about to do? I’ve never wet the bed ever in my life, & I’m not about to start now.

Is it strange or ironic that I’m sitting in a big box coffee shop writing this blog post & the air conditioning is so extremely strong that it’s not only making me shiver from head-to-toe, but it’s also making me want to pee real bad? I don’t know, but I’m now going to hastily end this post so I can get the hell out of here & soak up the warm sunshine outside. Perhaps thaw myself out a bit. Cheers! Brrrrr……

Today’s song of the day: