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I have a love-hate relationship with bubble baths, with taking baths in general. Yes, I love to take long, hot baths; watching an entire movie while sous vide-ing myself in the murky bathwater. However, every time I draw a bath, I feel a sense of guilt for using so much precious water, especially since I live in a state that year-after-year continues to exacerbate our already extreme water shortage. That’s one of the reasons why I stopped taking baths…to conserve water, but also because once I became pregnant, my fertility doctor advised me not to soak in the bath tub as it could potentially cause issues during my pregnancy.
Nowadays, I no longer take baths not only to conserve water, but to also conserve time. I used to love taking long leisurely soaking baths, but now I don’t have the time (or the energy) to take baths. I have also lost any motivation for my once favorite self-care pastime. On top of all that, do you really think my ‘nearly a toddler’ child would even let me have five minutes to myself, let alone take a private bath? The only time I’d ever get any alone time to take a bath would be in the dead of night while everyone else in the house is sleeping, but by then, I’m also passed out asleep myself.
Okay, so I did mention bubble baths at the very start of this post. I have always envied people who were able to take bubble baths. I cannot bear to take them myself, but to those who do, I applaud you & moderately envy you. Bubble baths are good, in theory, but I myself cannot find any reason to partake & indulge in them whatsoever. It’s just not for me & I’ll explain why.
First of all, I can never seem to get it right. I follow the instructions on the bottle exactly how it says. However, I always end up with a lackluster smattering of flat bubbles floating aimlessly around my tub. I would pour nearly the entire bottle of bubble solution into the bath, & the bubbles just fizzle & foam away.
As the photo above accurately depicts my poor attempts to create a bubbly bath; this is the end result every time I try to make up a bubble bath. I follow the instructions on the bottle down to the last letter, but it never quite comes out right. Sure, I get a big mound of bubbles at the start, right as the drawing of the bath begins, but towards the finish of drawing said bath…the bubbles flatten, & all I get is a murky frothy tub of water that smells mildly soapy.
Why can’t I get thick foamy bubbles like this? What am I doing wrong? Am I destined to live out my bathing career with unfulfilled dreams of thick foamy whipped bubbles? Probably, but it’s not a big deal.
For a long time I have had this romanticized fantastical image in my head that bubble baths were sexy, or more importantly, for sexy times. I’ve built up this idea in my mind that I’d draw a hot bath filled with the most foamy frothy bubbles. Then I’d dim the lights (I have dimmable lights in my bathroom), adjust my iPad just so, & put on one of my favorite movies with my favorite steamy scenes in it. Well, then you know what happens next, right? Yep, I wake from my rosy-colored stupor only to find myself sitting in a tepid bath with filmy flat suds floating all around me, the movie only halfway through it’s main plot. My sexy bath time fantasy will never be fulfilled.
Here comes my compulsive anxiety, rearing its ugly head yet again. While I do think bubble baths are fun, if you’re anyone under the age of 10, or a magical wizard able to get the bubbles to stay afloat, I also think that bubble baths are just a whole mess of trouble…& just a plain old mess by itself. I have tried many different brands of bubble bath solution, & they always end up leaving a ring of film around my bath tub basin at the end of my bathing session. Also, the bath tub feels simultaneously sticky & slippery if you can believe it.
On top of all that, I myself, feel like my skin has a layer of film from the bubble solution. So I end up having to rinse myself off with a simple shower afterwards, which I feel is totally redundant. I mean wasn’t the whole point of the bubble bath being to bathe myself & then luxuriate in a basin full of thick rich bubbles? No! I’m all sticky & filmy from the bubble solution, & then having to think about rinsing my bath tub basin afterward… Ugh! Why am I putting more stress on myself? I thought bubble baths were supposed to be relaxing, but just thinking about cleaning up afterwards tires me out, & discourages me from wanting to take these types of baths. I’ll just stick to my regular hot baths & be happy with that.
Well, Halloween is almost upon us. I would love for my little bean to dress up in a costume, preferably a cute, non-baby-ish looking one, but I know my little bean & she will hate anything I put her in. She hates wearing hats, or headbands, or anything covering her head &/or face (i.e. sunglasses, masks). I will have to get creative & choose something relatively simple. I know Jia would much rather prefer that I not spend any money at all, but I feel like now would be a good stage in our little bean’s childhood to start making these special memories. She’s already starting to remember things & making lasting memories. This Halloween season would be a good start to having her dress up in costumes. For now, I’m going to continue prepping the final details to my little bean’s 2nd birthday party. Cheers everyone!
Today’s song of the day:
This year I am going to make a New Year’s resolution, & I am going to try extra hard to stick to it. I only have one thing on my resolution & that is to loosen up my grip & my tight control over the caregiving of my little bean. This mostly means that I must worry less about my external family members meddling offering help in my role as a parent (i.e. pushing unsolicited advice, comparisons to other babies within our family, or any minor criticism). Since having a baby, I have had this nagging feeling in the back of my mind that the matriarch of my family is trying to push me out of my little bean’s life & take over as the primary caregiver. I really, really, really need to stop hyper focusing on this matriarch & just be the best parent to the little bean as I can be, in my own way.
I am a controlling person in my personal life, but I am actively working on loosening the reins in my life. I put this quote as my smartphone background wallpaper that says, “Don’t try to control the uncontrollable.” I think about this quote often, & sometimes I will abide by this quote, but I have been known to slip up very often & revert back to my OCD behaviors of micromanaging everything, especially in my little bean’s life. I have taken small strides these past couple of months in small ways. I talk to myself, inside my head, but also sometimes under my breath in a mumbled voice. I send myself verbal reminders. Often times I have resorted to immediately turning around & walk out of the room so I as not give myself reason(s) to nit-pick on trivial things. Other times, I will try to just go with the flow & deal with the aftermath later. Or I will force myself to mentally brush off any immediate jerk reactions/feelings. Jian also often pulls me aside to remind me that I am reverting back to my old habits, help me calm my internal discomfort, & help get some logic back into my senses.
Last year (I can’t believe I can say that now), our little trio took a second road trip to Las Vegas again to visit my oldest brother & sister-in-law right after Christmas…like, immediately…on Boxing Day. Our annual family tradition, per my late father’s request, is that no matter what our family would be together at our home (which is still the childhood home where most of us were born & raised) for the Christmas holiday. It didn’t matter what it took, we must all be together, & that was something that my dad adamantly stood by.
This past year was the very first time my brother & his family couldn’t come back to home base, but we were able to turn our holiday event into two separate events, & that ended up being more meaningful to us. Spending exclusive time with my big brother & sister-in-law has always been fun & meaningful, & this past Christmas break was just so memorable. Unfortunately, my little bean wasn’t able to spend the holidays with both of her older cousins (my brother’s two daughters) due to scheduling conflicts, but she did get to spend time with one of her cousins & also her two favorite dogs.
Visiting my brother & his family at their new place in Las Vegas doesn’t really feel like we are “in Vegas”. Even though we can spot random gambling places all over town, we still feel very far removed from the glitzy, touristy Vegas Strip. It’s so much fun discovering new places to eat & explore whenever we head over to my brother’s new place. We can’t wait until the next chance to visit his family again.
Oh my God, I am extremely excited that 2 sets of my closest friends are expecting babies of their own. Well, by the time you are reading this post, one set of my friends have already delivered their baby & are safely nestled at home with their menagerie of furry pets. The other set of friends are still waiting on their labor & delivery due date, so the circle of our friends are all collectively cheering them on from the sidelines. I, myself, am the happiest of them all. Not only does my little bean get to have new friends to play & grow up with, but I won’t feel so isolated in my immediate friend group by being the only mother to a young child.
I do have other friends who are already parents of much older children than my own, but in terms of my immediate circle of friends, Jian & I have been the only parents so far with a child under toddler age. Now Jian’s best friend & his wife (both of whom are extremely close friends of ours) have just welcomed their own little bean, a girl in fact. We just video chatted with our friends last night, & so far they have perfectly settled right in to being new parents.
We both could not be more happy for all of our friends, both of whom supposedly have similar delivery due dates (& are both expecting girls). Our little tight-knit friend group is now expanding into the next generation. It will be so exciting to see how all of our children will grow up together & interact with each other. I am curious to see how my little bean will take the lead as the oldest child in her group. She is bossy, so showing the other kids how to do things will be her specialty.
Since we are on the topic of children, my little bean attended her very first official children’s birthday party two weekends ago. This marked the first actual time she’s been around a large group of children near her age. My little bean has spent time with her first cousins, but none of them are close enough in age that they can interact easily with each other.
One of my friends & his wife hosted a birthday party for their 2-year old daughter at a public park, & there sure were a lot of kids at the party. My little bean was incredibly nervous & shy in the beginning, but then again, so were the other kids. Most of the kids at the party were born during the full-blown pandemic lockdown days (as was my little bean), so this was the most public interaction any of the kids have gotten so far.
A lot of the other kids were happily running around & playing games, but my little bean just wanted to stay close to mama & papa. It was a fun & festive party & a great way for our little bean to experience an event with kids her own age. It also gave Jian & myself a taste of what lies in our foreseeable future… a lot of tired parents huddled around the adult drinks station, while all the kids run around in controlled chaos, hyped up from eating too many sugary snacks. That is one thing I am not looking forward to.
This coming weekend, Jian is taking me & the little bean on a little 2-day road trip to Monterey Bay. We are all really excited to have this little family getaway after my mom’s extravagant birthday week, this past week, where so many people came to visit & celebrate my mom’s 76th birthday. My mom’s sister came to visit for the week. My brother came up for a few days, sans his newly-introduced girlfriend. Then, my sister & her whole brood popped by for a quick weekend jetset, which was great for the rest of us because we can only take being around my sister & her new husband in small doses. My mom had the time of her life being surrounded by the people closest to her & celebrating with her.
This quick weekend road trip will be a great break away from the grand matriarch, & it will also be a good time to get some fresh air & spend some quality family time out of the house with our little bean. Plus, it’ll be a good break for Jian before he starts his new job working for a subsidiary company under the Amazon corporate umbrella. I have been looking forward to this mini vacation all week. Our packing is all done & we are ready to go! Until next time, cheers everyone!
Today’s song of the day:
Ever since I have been spending 99.99% of my time cooped up inside the house with my little bean, I’ve had plenty of time to relax & truly enjoy my nesting time. I have found so much enjoyment & contentment in little random things. For one, I love giving my little bean a bath (she thoroughly enjoys it too), but I have also renewed my love of taking a super hot shower at the end of the day. Washing up & then jumping into bed while you’re still warm from the shower gives me all the happy feels. After that, it’s the little window of time between putting my little bean to bed & myself going to sleep that also gets me excited. It’s that little notch of quiet “me time” that I enjoy, playing games or internet window shopping on my tablet.
Also, with me being the overly-organized person that I am, I am so super duper overjoyed that my daughter is nearly as organized as I am. She likes to stick to her daily routine just as much as I like to build a daily routine for her. Since the day she came home, I’ve been gradually putting her on a fairly regimented routine. Of course at just a few weeks old there is no such thing as a schedule, but by the time she was one-month old, she was already sleeping in her own bassinet & only waking up a few times throughout the night to be fed & have her diaper changed. My little bean is now 5 months old & she sleeps all by herself in her own crib in her own room. Not only that, she sleeps all the way through the entire night until morning. She rarely wakes up in the middle of the night to be fed or have her diaper changed. See folks, it’s never too early to sleep train the babes. I’ve even trained my little bean to take naps at certain times throughout the day. She pretty much fell into a natural schedule where she also eats at around the same time every day. This has just made my daily schedule so much more organized…& also made my life easier (& more predictable too).
Taking my little bean on little outings, like to our socially distanced COVID-safe shopping mall every once in a while has also been fun. She’s only really fussed once or twice out of the few of times we’ve taken her to go out with us. It’s been fun taking her on these outings, training her to get used to loud noises as well as the hustle & bustle of the city. The only difficult part about taking my little bean out is when we have to pack up her diaper bag, a bottle of formula, & all of her stroller accessories. Jian & I try to adhere to the “less is more” approach, but alas my over-preparedness traits take over, & I end up packing too many little things for all the emergency scenarios I can think of just to go on a short trip to the local shopping mall. It’s also sort of fun to get lots of attention when people see us with our little bean. The other day Jian took us out to the big city to go window shopping & have a special lunch away from home, & everyone at the restaurant was so interested in getting to know our little bean. I kind of felt like a rock star mom for getting so much attention.
One other thing that I have been personally enjoying lately is quite weird & boring, but I love doing it nonetheless. I have really been enjoying brushing my tongue whenever I brush my teeth, so much so that it’s become almost like scrubbing my tongue extra clean with my toothbrush. I know this is a silly thing to get so excited about, but I do have a pet peeve about people with bad breath. I also have a slight paranoia about people thinking that my breath smells bad. So I make sure that I spend a little extra time brushing my tongue after each time I brush my teeth. It not only gives me that fresh breath & clean mouth feeling, but it also kind of makes me feel like I am massaging my tongue to prevent getting those pesky little white cold sores that pop up from time-to-time, & irritates every time my tongue rubs the inside of my mouth. I feel happy just thinking about it.
Next, it’s almost springtime & we are finally getting the winter-type weather we should have gotten during the actual winter season. The temperatures have been quite chilly, but not cold, & we’ve been getting some rain showers on-&-off in our area. As I have said numerous times before, I love rainy weather, & this time I get to share this experience with my little bean. Of course, as with all other babes, she doesn’t like it when it rains while she’s trying to sleep. The rain keeps her up at night. However, during the day, she’s a real trooper & can sleep through just about any noise. It was raining on & off all day yesterday, & I was really enjoying the soothing sounds & watching the rain drip drop off of the awning overhang in the courtyard of my house. Oh man, I wish we could have gotten more rain this past season so we could avoid a potential drought in our area, but it looks like this summer there’s going to be a whole lot less toilet flushing & shorter showers.
Well, that’s a few of the new things that I’ve really been paying attention to & loving recently. It’s truly amazing & blows my mind seeing my little bean progress & develop more every single day. I swear she is super intuitive & advanced for a babe her age. She is ultimately the light of my life, & I better finish this post before she wakes up from her nap again. Until the next nap…I mean post…cheers all!
Today’s song of the day
Rabbits & Foxes 
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